I’m certain that the title of this piece might have brought to mind the iconic Will Smith movie, which happens to be one of my all-time favourites as well. However, beyond the spelling differences, my perspective on this journey leans more toward introspection than motivation. While Will’s movie used ‘The’ as a prefix, I’ve chosen ‘In.’ Ever since I learned that Bhutan is considered the world’s happiest country, it has held a place on my travel wish list, and I’m eagerly anticipating the opportunity to witness it.

Happiness is a topic that we discuss many times throughout the day, and most of us have developed our own unique approaches to either experiencing or simulating happiness. What was once a simple concept has evolved into something so intricate that at times we turn to Google for guidance on understanding it. In my individual and group counselling sessions, I frequently encounter people who express a desire to be happy in their lives. This underscores the fact that happiness is indeed a pursuit for most of us, which inspired me to share my own perspective on happiness.

The term “happiness” has become highly subjective, with each person having their own unique interpretation of it. Some seek happiness in relationships, while others tie it to their future goals. For many, happiness is associated with securing suitable employment opportunities, while some find it in travel and exploration, and the list goes on.

The crucial question, however, is: How can we truly attain happiness?

We’ve turned happiness into something more tangible, which is why we often find ourselves in a relentless pursuit of it. Let me share a brief story before delving further: One day, a 10-year-old misplaced his pencil box and searched for it in the backyard. When his father came home from work, he inquired about it. The exchange went as follows:

Father: Son, what are you looking for?

Son: I misplaced my pencil box and I’m searching for it.

Father: Where did you leave it?

Son: As far as I can remember, I left it somewhere in the living room.

Father: Then, son, your search is in error. Go and search in the house; you can only find your belongings where you actually lost them.

In our quest for happiness, we often behave like the 10-year-old in this story, looking for it in the physical world. Our outward expressions are merely reflections of our inner emotions. Happiness is an emotional state that can only be felt from within. The problem is that we’ve associated happiness with a specific lifestyle or life pattern that we aim to achieve. In Buddhism, they say, “There is no path to happiness; happiness is the path.”

Despite being one of the most comfortable generations in human history, we often struggle to find happiness. 

Can we spare a few minutes each day for introspection? 

When I say a few minutes, I mean a complete break from our current thoughts and mental activities. Instead, we should use this time to reflect on our past wishes that were granted, our desires that were fulfilled, and observe our surroundings, including those who are striving to make ends meet. 

This may sound somewhat philosophical to some, but before sharing it here, I applied it to myself, and it truly works. Occasionally, a simple rearrangement of our home or workplace can help reactivate and channel the energy around us, making the familiar place appear more vibrant and pleasant.

Let’s refrain from expecting those around us to transform into the version we believe is best. Instead, let’s look inward and strive to become the best possible version of ourselves.

To truly experience happiness, it’s essential to replace anxiety with serenity, ingratitude with thankfulness, wishes and desires with gratitude, insecurity with love and affection, prejudices with admiration, expectations with generosity, apprehension with letting go, and ego with humility. “One way of being wise is to be happy.”

The pursuit of happiness never truly ends, as the word “pursuit” implies chasing something. The beauty of happiness lies in living it rather than chasing it. In psychology we believe, ‘Those who are depressed cling to their past, those who are anxious worry about the future (which cannot be seen), and those who are happy are actually living in the moment, which is their present.” 

Let’s decide which category we’d like to place ourselves in because dwelling in the past or the future will deprive us of enjoying our present. Life is not like a mutual funds investment that solely focuses on the future. Life is more about living in the present and cherishing each moment carefully and optimally. Let’s not waste the precious moments of our lives by worrying about the things we lack. Instead, let’s focus on the beautiful things we have around us, and happiness will naturally take hold.”

Happiness is in surrender, not in splendour…..

Thanks for reading

Love & Gratitude, 

Prince Dhawan